20.5.13

A Little Bit of History


When I finished high school in 2010 I knew I had to take a gap year in order to earn some money for my studies. I also needed a car and some time to sort out my matric paperwork from overseas. I found a job I really liked even before I was finished with high school. I applied for the post I wanted and got the job on a two year agreement.
The name of the company where I worked is Camp Discovery. It is a leadership and adventure centre for school, team building and other similar groups located 60km north of Pretoria, just into the bush of Limpopo. I became a facilitator there, my responsibilities among other things included writing programs for groups, basic maintenance on activity equipment and taking groups for activities such as game drives, obstacle courses, archery and air rifles. It is a really well managed place with incredibly high standards in service and product delivery.

I was forced to adapt to living away from home and my family for these two years (I had around eight off days a month). I also had to conform to the high standards and uphold them and improve upon them to the best of my ability. I had up to that point had hardly any responsibility compared to what I had there. I managed, by God’s grace, to excel there and I became the head training facilitator and for the last four months of my career there I was the assistant manager. Through all of this I learned and grew more than ever before in my life. Added to that I met literally thousands of people and was able to share God’s Word to many of them. Camp Discovery will always have a special place in my heart because of my experiences there.

But there was one thing I left behind for those two years which was difficult for me. I left my church family behind. I was hardly able to attend one Sunday service a month with my off day situation and I also missed out on many young adults meetings, bible studies and other church events. Whenever I did visit my church I just felt as if it was the best place to be.
I have been attending Free Grace Baptist Church since 2000 and although it has never really been a large church in numbers or one about which you always hear amazing stories, I still love my family there. Every week I have my ‘spiritual batteries’ recharged and I am always blessed by the meetings and ministries.

Having missed out on all of that for two years I was incredibly excited to return at the end of my Camp Discovery career. I have been back since February this year and I have never been more excited about it. I feel like I missed out on a lot during my two years at Camp Discovery so now I attend eagerly as many meetings as I can. Added to that, I have my fellow members of the body of Christ around me all the time to pray with me, to share burdens with and to fellowship with in Christ.

The local church is the centre of my life as it is the core of my service to and relationship with God. I am truly blessed to be a part of the loving family of the body of Christ which will one day worship Him forever  and always in heaven.

11.5.13

The Wanderer

Sometimes I look into the mirror and wander what's going to happen next. Sometimes I'm sad because I know pain from the past can happen again. Sometimes I'm happy because I know that joy from the past can happen again. But then I realise that it is all the same - the pain and joy is all the same. Nothing new is going to happen tomorrow that didn't happen in one of my yesterdays.

I'm still scared though - that something new might happen. Something I won't be able to handle or perhaps that I will do something new - something I didn't think I would - something I didn't think I could. But why am I scared? I'm in control of my life right? I think that's what scares me - me. Because I mess up a lot. I cause pain - bitter pain.

If I'm in control then I'll always cause pain because nothing new ever happens - I don't know how to do anything else. But can't someone who causes joy do something? Can't someone who cause joy just get under my skin and make me do that? I don't know why exactly, but I'd rather cause joy than pain. I want my tomorrows to be new, not old.

When I think like this sometimes I cry from the pain I've felt - the pain I've caused. I cry because sometimes I feel like my old will never get new. What is the answer? Is there a cure for the pain?

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I'm looking into this mirror again now. Tears are forming in my eyes...again. But they're different now. I think there's something joyous about them. I have found the answer, I have found hope of a cure - hope for new. It dwells inside of me. It changes me.
 
I guess we all wander, but it's something else to wander with hope.